Pacing in Dating

It is for sure that all of us know that the expression “Let’s take it slow” is easier said than it is done. This is true most especially when you meet someone you are immediately infatuated and attracted with, but mind you, taking the time to really get to know this special someone is crucial thing for building the foundation of a hopefully long-term kind of relationship.

This is why we have to take things slow and not fall into the trap of immediately dashing and rushing things out with someone you just got to know. And because of that, I have made here a list of tips to keep your pacing while in dating.

1. Step up and speak up-

If you want to take it slow, then you must say it so. And it is advised to say it early for you to communicate it clearly. If you were able to establish some boundaries and a pace you are comfortable with early on, you won’t be panicking around and alarm your date with an awkward connotation and interruption that both of you need to slow things down. You should ensure that you were able to reassure your partner that the real reason why you want to take your time slow is because you’re really into him or her and don’t want to mess things up especially in a romantic relationship by jumping in too fast.

2. Don’t confuse honesty with just a verbal form of diarrhea-

You don’t have to air that entire proverbial dirty thirty” on the first date just because he or she asks you, personal questions about your personal life. Just be honest and be open. However, you must still refrain from unloading every little detail of it. If it is about your exes, your dire financial situations, or health issues, then dismiss it right away. There will be a time and place to share those things eventually, but the first few dates usually don’t qualify it as appropriate.

3. Always use restraint-

Just because you both made fun of Miley Cyrus on your very first date doesn’t mean that you have to text her every single time you hear “The wrecking balls” in the grocery store. Don’t act on every impulse you got to make contact. Instead, you must share some of those little moments and stories with your perfect date the next time you were able to spend time together.

4.  You should avoid talking about your collective future.

While still in the process of dating, don’t make plans yet together too soon. Pretty sure, you both love all the French food, but this doesn’t necessarily mean that both of you should be making theoretical and hypothetical plans to visit Paris together in the next season especially when you’ve only been dating for the last two weeks. This isn’t a good idea. You should be not talking about fun with New Year’s plan if you just started dating on the month of July. Moreover, never start planning for a wedding until you’re both ready to have your relationship long term and steady.